Your Empathetic Journey
Received by, Julie Miller
January 01, 2013
Every single dear soul has been in conditions where there were awful misunderstandings, one or the other that was involved in the dialogue had felt misunderstood, sometimes both. As you leave such situations you find yourself confused and bewildered to what had just occurred. You may question how it was possible your intentions were misunderstood. And many times dear ones what we hear most often is, “What did I do?” You may question, “Why could he or she not understand what I am trying to convey? Let me tell you right now dear ones, there is no one person to blame, no reason to criticize what you do not fully comprehend and it is essential dear ones to make your feelings known. While communicating with another it is vital to listen, and not always with your ears but from your other sensory abilities. If you do not understand what is being said, tell the person you do not understand to avoid falsely interpreting what is being relayed.
It has been widely observed that whenever a situation becomes difficult even with many people of the cultures of the world today fall into a crude and critical form of language. Even while you are attempting to be civil during a difficult situation this critical sort of language becomes internal and you often think, “Why can’t I do anything right?” Understand dear ones there makes no difference on the language of your mother tongue, what is understood that there is a critical language that speaks onto your self more often than it is necessary. This critical language creates judgements, labels for all people, belittles other people’s efforts, etc. It is a language that is definitely not friendly yet many of you have used this language throughout this lifetime.
Throughout your life you must interact and communicate with others, either in person or through other ways that are modern and popular. It is very possible to be able to be able to communicate your feelings, what it is you want without any conflict at all. There is no blaming, no telling how another should do their work, no labeling and there becomes a larger interest in the person’s feelings, what they want and need. This is the language of the heart. It connects each of you to each other and to everything, whereas the critical way of communicating separates you from the community even if that community is your family or friends.
What is considered important dear ones is how to communicate during stressful circumstances. Always try to relax in order to hear what is being said clearly, respond by replaying what was just said but in your own words for clarification and when you feel calm enough you will know when to express what is important to you. The more calm both parties are, the better all will be heard and understood. In order to effectively communicate you must be able to understand the words that are being addressed, but if one or both are upset, misunderstandings will be a definite outcome. Take the time to really listen dear ones.
If you find yourself in a situation where you are both frustrated with how your conversation is progressing you need to understand your own inner foundation of knowledge that is not dependent on anything, being compassionate to yourself is very important for character building and increases your own self-confidence. When you seek empathy for yourself you are reaching for inner peace and calm – a place to balance and center yourself among any chaos that has crossed your path. Empathy dear ones is a skill that is becoming underdeveloped yet it is a very respectable ability if this skill is honed to mastery.
We suggest dear ones to always express yourself with honesty through what you are observing. When you are choosing to express your feelings, speak of them but in a non-evaluative way. Make what you are wanting to achieve not a demand but a goal. When you are able to do this you will see Hope become part of your empathetic journey. When you are on the listening end dear ones, always hear what the other person is trying to say. Observe what is being said, make an attempt to guess or think how this person is feeling and if they correct you that is okay, simply repeat what is being retold so you have heard correctly in order to understand fully. After you understand, express your compassion towards them and offer how you may help. Most times dear ones, all another person really wants is to be heard, they don’t always come to have their problems fixed, they require human comfort and understanding and when you are able to drop all pretenses growth is reached for both or all involved.
From what we have been able to see from where we sit, there is an automatic tendency to interpret everything you are observing. It is essential to be always aware of what is happening around you at all times but when you are not in a threatening situation, this sort of evaluating and interpreting doesn’t serve any purpose. What does occur if you choose to continue to always evaluate every situation as threatening, you will be adding toxic definitions to what it is you are observing. Information that is not there becomes added that has much to do with a past similar situation that becomes over imagined to the point worry has been created thus creating unwelcomed things to occur. It is such imaginings and projections that cause so many conflicts between relationships. And it is another good reason why it is incredibly important to communicate, reach with your heart, ask questions, and be in the KNOW.
It is true that the majority of humans are not consciously aware of this process as it happens. You require seeing or hearing something in order to trigger a reaction or response. To develop better Compassionate Communication you must become aware of what it is you are observing and how it is possible to be adding your own additional content that includes your own imagination, your own worries and expectations possibly creating an interpretation that is critical, labeled with judgments from what you have analyzed. What needs to be done dear ones is bring this inner process into full consciousness in order for you to look and see if your thoughts regarding what you have observed is correct or if you need to make adjustments.
When we hear this common complaint, “I feel rejected”, we are really hearing two distinct declarations. One declaration is that you are experiencing an uncomfortable feeling, the second declaration tells us that there is an accusation that someone did something wrong that caused you to feel rejected. When there is a complaint like this there is reason for discussion because it requires someone to clarify their actions that were possibly misunderstood. But when we hear you say how sad you are, that clearly defines an inner experience that has left you feeing sad. There is no complaint; it is pure feeling on your inner self at a specific moment. Many disagreements have been developed mainly dear ones from misunderstandings.
To increase your ability to compassionately communicate you need to take a much closer look at how you really feel and how you are attributing an interpretation to what is happening within the situation. You cannot fully sense your needs, wants or desires while you still carry lingering judgments on them. And you cannot offer guidance to another if you still have judgments about their own values and needs. As you meander through your journey you are constantly distracted by many attractions and what it is you need to survive and to be happy. Such things can be from the most basic needs for shelter, food, love, sense of belonging and discovering your sense of purpose and desire to help make the world a cheerier place.
It is whenever you feel what is important to you threatened in any way no matter how big or small is when you automatically react in a protective way. We urge you to understand dear ones the truth is that just about every person that shares this beautiful planet have the same basic needs. But it is when you stop communicating your needs, you stop working together and goals do not get met then you never get to discover that this other person actually does respect you and does wish you happiness. Unfortunately dear ones, many of your needs and desires become buried until you are barely conscious of them. And when it is necessary to express them you end up not being able to articulate them to others especially if you they are a threat of some kind and you fear you will be criticized as you have observed many times throughout your journey.
We encourage you, each of you to become more conscious of the needs you have when you feel threatened and understand that all your needs and longings are created through the heart. Be brave dear ones and begin to articulate your feelings, express what it is you want that helps to find a way that is mutual to all that is involved without the need for verbal slander or any other kind of negative reaction.
Realize the importance of accepting another person’s needs does not mean you are required to do anything. It is most important that your feelings, what is you want and need is heard and understood. The connection you are making through every communication is important. Through each communication there is ample opportunity for growth, understanding, to demonstrate your wizened heart, to develop deeper compassion for the person that has reached to you and to yourself. As you are helping someone just by listening, you are also helping yourself by reaching a higher level of consciousness that is healing and energizing.
We will continue more about empathy and compassionate communication in our next message. It pleasures us to be here today, this new day as every day is a new day to learn something new, to discover a new skill or ability, to raise your consciousness or to master patience or another key virtuous characteristic, the potential for growth is presented to you each and every day dear ones, reach each day and be amazed at what you can achieve when you put your whole heart and soul into every effort.
I AM Ascended Master through Julie Miller