This morning, I woke up with enough inspiration to add seven pages to my novel in less than an hour, and the exercise has maneuvered me in a state where you guys and gals get the short end of the stick: I'm leaving website update to my other team members today, and will enjoy this day in total relaxation. As a bandaid, here are the pages I added today:
Thursday, October 30th,
lied to me today, but both he and I Know it: Henk told me today his
Thursday meetings are going to end, so I won't be able to continue
visiting his psychic hour.
case you hadn't guessed, Henk is a psychic. He is the guy who helped
me realize about the vow I'd made at age eight, to figure out the
Cosmos, and tell everyone who will hear about it. I'm glad he did,
especially from the viewpoint of where I am now, finishing the novel
that will be the culmination of this life's work.
magically appeared as a friend of a friend of a colleague of my wife,
in a moment where I desperately needed him. The first night he told
me my soul was aligned someway half outside my body, but he wouldn't
fix it. Instead, he had me fix it myself! Make-belief, hypnosis, name
it what you want, but that night I felt better than I had in years!
held what he called his Thursday meetings, and invited me to come. No
entrance fees or anything, although some of us sometimes brought
cookies to go with the ever abundant coffee. When one day I offered
him fifty euros for his services, he looked at me and merely asked:
“Why are you doing this?” in a non-incriminating manner.
on the table, Henk taught me to recognize the flow of energy
throughout my body, and he kept trying to teach me to breathe
properly. In that, he seemed not to succeed, or did he: I've always
been a shallow on-demand breather. Just couldn't stick to his program
of deep, belly-based breathing.
he asked me to write. Write manually, while in fact I dislike my own
handwriting. I did it, but for serious writing like this novel I
still stick to hammering it out on the keyboard. Maybe my disregard
for his lessons is what eventually got him to call it “Class
Dismissed!”, but I don't think so.....
last experiment I remember around that time happened around that
time, was an outing to the local kids farm with my family. I was very
occupied with my being, and while the kids played, I was sitting on a
bench in the Sun. A fly came up to me, and landed on my right leg,
just above the knee. I figured, if my vibration was OK, I'd be able
to approach it sincerely, without disturbing it.
moved my left hand, index finger outstretched, to the vicinity of
it's bulging faceted eyes, quite slowly. Do you know how hard it is
to approach a common housefly from the front, to within one
millimeter of it's head? I did succeed however, and we sat there for
seconds, face to 'face'.
I broke the magic by becoming greedy, and carefully nudged its head.
The fly got up, and landed just out of range of my hand, as if to
say: “OK, I know your boundaries now....”
I later told Henk about it, he applauded me for having made so much
progress. And when he stopped seeing me on Thursdays, he offered his
help for anything I might require later on. Well Henk, I'd love to
send you this manuscript, but by now I think you will somehow
magically get your hands on it when the time comes....
Saturday, April 17th,
I am somewhat in conflict, but in a good way. I'm going to break my
word in a manner of speaking, but only because I know Jolene will
forgive me, in a way will even silently applaud me for it!
like I Knew Henk, the psychic that helped me at age 35 to remember my
vow at age eight, was lying when he told me his Thursday meetings
were ending, I just Know Jolene meant just about the complete
opposite of what she told me: she asked me not to tell anyone about
her life, but I'm sure she'll absolutely not mind that I tell this
story anyway, with the proper precautions to achieve what the
business end of the world would call 'Plausable Denyability', or in
other words, a bit of white lying magic to protect the innocent.
met Jolene on the train the other day, quite by incident, and very
nicely. Somehow, I felt very, very connected to her, even though she
turned out to be a person who had an uncanny ability to tell me
exactly what kind of a person I am! Or maybe just because of that,
because with her, my Know-indicator was on the blink.
despite the obvious connect, she kept her distance. We did exchange
addresses, and over the next few weeks, she phoned me a couple of
times, just to hear about how I was doing, and what was up in my
life. Jolene felt very awesome, kinda like Selina, even though with
her there was this barrier, which both of us kept intact: externally,
she was the kind of person I'm not really attracted to, which was
aggravated by the fact she tried convince me that our relationship
was purely business (which is kind of a dirty word to me).
claimed she needed help with her computer, and one day, I was invited
to provide said help. I traveled there at the appointed hour, and
walked the last few hundred meters from the bus to her home, or at
least the address she gave me. It was in a well to do neighborhood,
all privately owned homes. I rang the bell, and was invited in, only
to find myself in a pigsty! I mean, she'd warned me her place was a
mess, but I figured it to be like mine sometimes is, for lack of
futuristic domestic droids. This however looked far worse, and my
first instinct, which I immediately followed, was to offer her to
help clean things up a bit. She wouldn't hear of it however, claiming
she'd gotten me in there to help her along where the computer was
I sat down, amidst a flurry of newspaper clippings, partially opened
mail, and other 'messy' things. Nothing really gross, just this
consistent wrapping of disorder that I could easily ignore in order
to get my work done. She wanted a general cleanup of her computer,
like I've done dozens of times for myself and others. Defrag,
cleanup, remove unused software, install basic stuff needed to do
proper work, you know the drill. So did I, or so I thought...
seen she used Outlook for her mail, but also observed that her Word
and Excel where complaining about needing an installer CD to be
usable. I usually resort to public domain software wherever possible,
and so gave her the option of having OpenOffice installed, instead of
those office applications. She agreed, not realising like
I should have, that
her Outlook was part of the Microsoft Office I was aiming to replace.
We chatted on, while she made us something to eat in a kitchen that
to me would have been barely unacceptable as starting point for
was a home-brewn soup, as she called it, quite tasty, but too many
unknown ingredients to be on my list of favorite dishes. I somewhat
too ardently refused seconds, but we parted as friends. Then, after
I'd gotten home, she called that her E-mail no longer worked.
Realizing my colossal blunder I gladly took the blame, but was
relieved she didn't expect me to get back on the train right that
instance. I did offer to attempt a rescue using TeamViewer, so I
could take over her system from home, but being a self-proclaimed
digifobe, she declined that. She did get another friend to call me
later, to dissolve the matter via phone.
then there's the little incongruities that trigger you to the
weirdness of the situation: though Jolene claimed she was afraid of
computers, I counted no less than three
systems in her home: the computer I needed to work on, an IBM
Thinkpad carelessly lying around, and a Compaq DeskPro system in one
of the bedrooms. Add to that the question she'd asked me about
purchasing Val's old laptop, and I guessed myself in the twilight
of zones: even though she and I were in the zone constantly, I was
very near the edge of my comfort zone while in that place. To me, a
home needs to be somewhat cleaner to be comfortable, but it was
Jolene's home, so I kept abiding by her will, and tried not to
disturb the flurry of newspaper clippings that so cozily surrounded
I mailed her to inquire if her friend's rescue operation had
succeeded. I got back a mail, so it obviously had: she said she
wasn't angry or disappointed, but told me not to mail, phone, or try
to contact her otherwise.
I could mourn the loss of a friend, but this sounded way more like:
“School's over, class dismissed!”
sync: I just found out Rush are on their “Time Machine Tour”! How
very syncy that they are mentioned in various places in this Now Time
A week of touring the South of the United States and I have to say that earth is magnificent! Our first destination was Shenandoah National Park in Virginia. The vistas that unfolded before us were incredible. The rock walls, and the trees and flora were astounding. Deer grazing everywhere. You could horseback ride to falls or hike and camp. I bought a book called "The Songs of Insects, by Lang Elliott and Wil Hershberger." I wanted it due to the colorful pictures large and expansive but the best part is the cd of songs of insects is included. Extinction of some of these insects may be in the future if we aren't active in prevention. Going to the ocean was a different kind of excitement. I stayed at a condo on Wrightsville beach in North Carolina. Although it was windy the sun shone brightly. I always ask the ocean to gift me with a shell that is called and looks like a "ladys ear." Sure enough, though the surf was rough whole lady ears appeared beneath my feet. I gave thanks and asked the ocean for another gift something unique perhaps. Again, there it was... what looks like a baby whales fin that has been fossilized. Next I asked Neptune for a special rock.....it appeared shiny, coral, rocks and a chunk of grey marble. Later that evening a man who owned a restaurant called the "Castaways," had his group play music from Bob Marley and Jimmy Buffet with a steel drum and bongo drums with guitar. It was sung with such sincereity and simple joy that people had to sing along. Late at night I had the pleasure of being surrounded by thunderstorms that rolled and rolled into the distance each moment with a crack of light. Nature in all her glory. The next morning the water was so close to our condo and men were out surfing while the lifeguards scanned the waters and performed their drills. The clouds were huge billows then a peak of azure blue and soon the day was sprayed with sunbursts and trilling birds. I also toured Greensville, South Carolina. Downtown has a huge waterfall and a park that never ends with green sprawling lawns and rock bridges and a suspension bridge. Red Tulips sprouted and cherry blossoms blooming with Robins hopping and bobbing inbetween. What caught my attention was the southern charm of its people. They were genuine and as comforting as your grandparents. Their wit and conversations were peppered with humor. They talked about their lives as if we are all going through the same dilemmas and easing the hour with friendship. They made me feel as if they had tied the knot of kinship in less than a fragment of a moment. In one shop they taught you how to make a necklace or a gift and helped you do it right when you walked in, what fun inventing the pieces to be used and selecting items from around the globe. The idea was to bond with new people and ideas while they helped with the tools and fashioning your beautiful item. I am home now but I realize that home is where your heart is and presently its 900 miles away. I am still sorting my treasures of the sea and feel the sand exfoliating my feet while the healing salt water edges its way up my leg. I think I will take a bath with sea salts and listen to a cd I bought for a dollar at the Greenville bubble tea store for $1.00. It is the immeasurable memories that seed my dreams tonight.....and warm the soul.
Beloved one, every lifetime you have left a mark upon our holy
Mother Earth--sometimes a physical mark, but I mean more the spiritual
mark. You have made impact, and you have left your energy. It is there
when you go back and you visit what would be a foreign land or a new
place, and you find something that feels familiar. It is because you
have left your energy in those places.
Everywhere you walk you
leave an imprint. You even have in your world now a focusing upon what
is called the carbon footprint, and how big your footprint is in the
global focus of energy. Everywhere you have gone in this lifetime and
other lifetimes you have made impact of one sort or another.
have prophecy now that there is going to be a big change upon holy
Mother Earth in the year 2012, as it has been called. You have found all
kinds of channeled information about it, and this is wonderful, because
you are bringing it forth for yourself in order to sit with it and see
what your truth is about the year 2012.
You do not have to accept
anyone else's truth; that is their truth. You choose for yourself what
feels true to you and what you want to experience. Because, you see, the
year 2012 has not been written yet -- even though you may have the
"wise ones" who are channeling all of the information about what is
going to happen.
But I say unto you, 2012, 2011, 2010 has not
been written yet. Even what you see as the morrow has not been written
yet. You are the makers of what you experience. You are the makers who
are the judge and jury of everything that you bring forth, and as it is
written in your holy Scriptures, that whatever you create, call it good,
because truly, everything is good, even if it has the appearance of
being a disaster. It will lead, and it has led, the holy Child to a
place where you can make a new choice.
You have chosen some great
challenges and some smaller challenges in order to live your divine
being. It was the same for me: would I travel to far lands to study with
the great masters of that time, would I teach the multitudes or just
the few, would I experience the crucifixion and arise up in the
resurrection to continue that lifetime? These were some of the choices I
looked at in that lifetime.
Take yourself back…in this moment,
allow yourself the deep breath, and allow yourself to go back to the
being that you have been in the Atlantean time when you were the creator
bringing forth new creative inventions, when you were working with
crystals, and when you were finding what crystals could do as you were
knowing Oneness with the energy of a crystal.
Allow yourself to
feel how you felt and to see the goal that you had in that lifetime as
to how you wanted to use the energy of the crystals. Some of you in a
particular lifetime saw the energy of the crystal to convey to you
personal power. Others of you saw the healing energy of the crystal and
how it could be used for healing.
In the last couple of moments
you have traveled, as your historians measure time, back many, many eons
of time to a realization, a reality that is true; it is legendary
according to some of your history books, if it is mentioned at all, but
it is true. It is a true reality that you have lived. You have been
You have also walked the path of peace with nature in
Lemuria. Feel you that peace and know that that peace of nature can be
found yet. Some of your trees which have been growing for centuries of
time, allow yourself to sit with them in the mind and sometimes with the
physical body, and to ask of them what they have seen, and what they
would advise for the future.
Everything is open to you.
Everything. There is nothing that is held away from you. There is
nothing that would be denied. It cannot be denied the holy creative
Child that you are. That is why I encourage you to go for it, to live
your dream, to ask of yourself what is your dream. What do you want to
see happening in your own life? What do you want to see happening with
the grouping of friends? What do you want to see upon the face of our
holy Mother, the Earth?
You are a great master. You have chosen
to be in this reality at this time, just as you have chosen many other
times when there would be a turning of an age, a time of awakening. You
have said, "I want to be there for the quickening of the energy. I want
to be there to add my energy to it."
You are a courageous master.
You have come from the place of the heart. That is what the root of the
word courageous comes from--coeur--the heart. You come from the heart
to serve the Light, to serve the awakening one more time.
measure of a master, and the measure of mastery itself, is very simple.
The measure of mastery is in the time that it takes you to be in the
place of turmoil, to understand the place of confusion, and then to come
to peace. Sometimes it may take you a decade or longer. They call it a
certain stage of life. You may have to live through a certain stage of
life. Other times it may take you a couple of weeks. Other times it may
take you only a deep breath, and then you come to that place of peace
that says, "Whatever happens is good, because it serves the atonement.
Whatever happens, I add my energy of knowing the blessedness of it, and
therefore it is good."
So if you want to know the measure of how
you as a master are coming along with this journey, if you want the
progress report, you can do this for yourself easily. When you get into
that place where you do not know what to do, or you feel that everything
seems to be at sixes and sevens and nothing is working together, allow
yourself the deep breath and come to the place of peace. If it does not
happen right away, that is okay. Take another deep breath and ask for
peace. If it takes you an hour, a day, a fortnight, even a year to be at
peace with something, that is okay. That is the measure of mastery.
If you would cast your mind back to a decade ago when you were in a
certain situation and there was perhaps an issue that was very close to
your heart and it hurt, now you look at it and you see it differently.
You can see the blessing that has been in it and the goodness in it,
even though at the time, a decade ago, it might have been very painful.
The measure of mastery can happen with the deep breath in an
instant, or it may take longer, and that is okay. There is no judgment,
because truly there is no time. In this reality there seems to be time,
but in truth, it does not matter if it takes you lifetimes before you
have lived a certain situation over and over and over and then finally
come to a place where you have said, "It really doesn't matter. It
really doesn't affect me at all, what ‘they' choose to do."
sometimes in a lifetime it seems very important what "they" have chosen
to do, and you can feel very hurt by what they have chosen to do. But
then you can come to a place where you say, "But that touches me not. It
is their choice. It is what they see to be important that they need to
do," and you can let it go.
The measure of a master can be
measured by how long or short a time it takes you to come to that place
of peace. It can be done, as I said, with the deep breath. It can be
done with the candle. If you are wanting something tangible, light a
candle and look into the flame, the energy of the candle, and know
yourself to be that light, for truly, you are the one creating the light
of the candle. In truth, that candle does not exist except as you have
brought it forth in your consciousness.
Now, the world does not
say that to you. The world says that if you touch the flame, you are
going to feel it. But that is the teaching of the world, and you can go
beyond that. You have seen ones snuff out the candle flame with their
fingers, and you wonder, "How can they do that? That's fire. How can
they snuff out that flame with their fingers?" You have thought, "If I
did that, it would be too hot."
But if you are in a certain state
of mind and you reach out and you squeeze the flame, you can extinguish
it with no harm to the fingers. It is the state of mind, the
consciousness that makes the difference. However, I would suggest that
as you develop trust in knowing the shift in consciousness, for the
first few times you snuff the candle flame, you wet your fingers first.
(Smile) It is the state of mind, it is the consciousness that determines
what you see your life to be and how you see it to be.
you have wondered, "Why am I here? I enjoy my life, I enjoy traveling, I
enjoy my friends, I enjoy the books that I read, but why am I here?
Surely there has to be a reason more than that." It is to be the Light
that lifts up the world. It is to be the master in realization and to
know that every issue that comes to you, you have invited.
sometimes separated ego does not want to hear that. "I invited this
mess? I invited this relationship? I invited all of this abuse? I have
invited the illness? I have invited the economic downturn?" Yes, you
have, in order to know your divine power, in order to know the divine
power of choice to live in a different space.
That is what I have
called the measure of mastery, to be able to choose to live in the
space of divine love, a space that knows that no matter what the world
is doing, no matter what the body seems to be doing, no matter what
anyone else is doing, "I am living the I Am Intelligence. I Am Love. I
am okay." Start with that one. You can understand that one, the human
self. "I am okay." And you are. You are truly more than okay, but
sometimes separated ego does not want to go any farther than that, so
you can start with, "I am okay…I think." And you are.
yourself in every day to celebrate your Self. And by that, I mean to
look back over the challenges, the experiences of this lifetime and to
see where you have come. See where you were a decade ago. And separated
ego may say, "Well, a decade ago I was younger. I was prettier; I was
more handsome. I had more golden coins. I had more of the worldly
accolades…" Maybe yes, maybe no.
But as you will assess the
measure of mastery, you will realize that now you can come to the place
of peace much more quickly than you did previously. You can come to the
place where you are okay with whatever anyone else chooses. You are okay
with whatever the body brings to you. You are okay with every issue,
because you know that you are more than any issue.
Some of the
issues feel like big stumbling blocks. You lose a loved one and they do
not send you a post card, and it feels big. But the master of you--and
you are a master--comes to know that that experience was not a downer.
It was not a minus sign, but a plus, and you look at all of the treasure
that came from whatever issue you have dealt with or are dealing with.
You look at all of the expansion of experience that it brings to you
instead of looking at all that you have lost, because truly you never
lose anything anyway.
You look at all of the positive things that
have come out of that experience, all of the treasures that you have
stored away in the treasure chest, and only you know those treasures.
You can open that treasure chest and you can take out each jewel and
look at it and say, "This is the jewel that came from when my parents
left. This is the jewel that came when my mate left. At the time I
thought it was a piece of coal, an old stone, an old rock. I would have
thrown it away, but something told me to put it in the treasure chest.
And now I see that there are sparkles on it, and it looks different to
That is the measure of the master: to be able to see the
good very quickly in everything that you experience. As you travel the
journey of life, there are many opportunities to judge; to judge self:
that is the first one. You have been taught, even subconsciously, by the
parents and the peers that you were not quite good enough. Maybe you
did not make the cheer-leading squad. Maybe you did not make the first
string of the football team. Maybe you were not the best orator. Maybe
you did not get the highest grades, etc.
The peers would tell you
whether you were good enough or not good enough, and the parents--even
the most well-meaning parents--would encourage you to do better. And you
thought, "Well, if they are saying that I should do better, that means
that I'm not there yet, I'm not perfect yet, so I must be imperfect."
Your heavenly Father/Mother sees you as perfect, because you have to
be. You are the extension of that creative Principle. It is neutral.
There is no good or bad, less or more. It Is, and there is no judgment
Allow yourself to know that you are the master come once
again into this experience to let your Light shine, to be joyful in the
face of sorrow, to be comforting to another one and to lift them up with
Know that always I am here for you. If there is no one
else who will listen to you, I will listen to you. Always I hear you
when you call. Call upon me. I am always here for you. I love That Which
you are, because I know That Which you are: the divine holy Child
experiencing and expressing as the human one more time. And I give unto
you my great respect, my joy, and my love.
So be it.
Jeshua ben Joseph (Jesus) in expression through Judith
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