We are in the pause between heartbeats. We are in the place
between the in and out breath. We are learning how to connect with the
intangible. My group, , expresses my feelings
of what is occurring at this time. We can no longer turn away from our
own suffering or that of humankind.This time has been so challenging for
most of us in one way or another. As we are still residing in the void,
things may come crashing, swirling, twirling, and buzzing by us, yet we
remain in a quiet place of no action. Our reaction depends on how
peaceful, balanced, and aligned we can be. Trust. Faith. Patience. Hope.
Breathe deeply and remain focused on the present.

Here are the
lyrics:

On the Turning Away

On the
turning away

From the pale and downtrodden

And
the words they say

Which we won’t understand

"Don’t
accept that what’s happening

Is just a case of others’
suffering

Or you’ll find that you’re joining in

The turning away"

It’s a sin that somehow

Light is changing to shadow

And casting its
shroud

Over all we have known

Unaware
how the ranks have grown

Driven on by a heart of stone

We could find that we’re all alone

In the dream
of the proud

On the wings of the night

As
the daytime is stirring

Where the speechless unite

In a silent accord

Using words you will find are
strange

And mesmerized as they light the flame

Feel the new wind of change

On the wings of the
night

No more turning away

From the
weak and the weary

No more turning away

From
the coldness inside

Just a world that we all must share

It’s not enough just to stand and stare

Is it
only a dream that there’ll be

No more turning away?

We are being urged to connect on a deeper level. To go to the
deepest recess of our hearts and feel once again (or for the first
time). We have become conditioned to be to much of what is going on
around and within us. This is the awakening of the ages and with it
comes some pain as we are birthing a new reality. As we are in the birth
canal, we begin to see with new eyes, hear and speak with new (or no)
words. We wait as things unfold and unfurl. Learning to live in the new
is a loving task in patience.

It may feel unpleasant not
knowing what lies ahead. Our connection to our past is severed. You may
have brief snips of memories and feelings of the past but it is no
longer in our . If you are not yet at this point in your
process, set your intention to let it go and it will be gone.
Relationships and situations of the past are irrelevant. The future is
completely veiled. We are living in total trust and waiting to see what
is yet to come. Quoting another one of my fav Pink Floyd songs,
Comfortably Numb reminds me of the pause between our past and present.

When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse, out of the
corner of my eye. I turned to look but it was gone. I cannot put my
finger on it now. The child is gone. The dream is gone. And I have
become comfortably numb.”

The natural disasters, and
financial restructuring occurring in our world are synchronistic of the
awakening from our numb state. We need to pay attention and be mindful.
There is no more turning away. Those of us who have held the light and
been the Light-bearers are retiring and handing over the torch to those
who are awakening. We’ve been the way-showers and lighthouses for so
long that we have grown weary from our roles. It is time for those of us
who have been in service to move on to our new spaces (wherever they
may be).

My life has been on hold for so long. as I did my duty
of serving humanity. While I will always be there to help in ways I can,
I no longer feel it is my responsibility. I don’t have any desire to
serve, other than to be a loving, kind person. I have a very low
tolerance for unconsciousness. I just can no longer fathom it. It seems
so incongruent to my beliefs and values. However, I feel no need to
guide. Those will see when they are ready to see. My focus is solely on
myself. Seems selfish? Heck yeah and I’m loving it!

I live with
no agenda or motive. I reside in the present moment. I stop myself from
projecting into the future because it is futile. At this point the
future is completely unknown. It is the phoenix rising from the ashes of
the unknown. Endings are occurring all around us. My son is graduating
from high school and my role as a mother has vastly shifted. My child
support ends, thus severing my connection with my ex-husband.
Ironically, my television set that worked perfectly for 20 years zapped
this week. It was my last remaining object that I had from my past with
my ex. I wait for my loan modification to be processed. For almost a
year I have been going back and forth with the mortgage company. I hold
faith that all will work out in perfect synchronicity. I admit there is
some fear involved, some sadness, much relief, and a feeling of
accomplishment and pride. When anxiety sneaks up I come back to this
present moment where everything is good. With endings come new
beginnings, all in good time.

I rescued two kittens from my
bushes in front of my house a little over 6 months ago. Around the same
time I fostered a dog that desperately needed a home. The kittens and
the rescue dog were all very ill adjusted. My beloved dog was
transitioning at the time. During this period I nurtured all of my pets
as I took care of myself as well. I found I spent much of my free time
helping them heal and adapt. I was able to stay in the present and not
project into the future of the unknown.

It has been such a slow
process for the kittens and rescue dog to learn to trust humans, get
along with one another, and most importantly gain health and vitality. I
had no idea how my extended family would adjust. Little by little, each
day, a new milestone has been reached. Six months later, we are still
in the process of healing (me included!) With patience I witness things
shifting within all of us in ways that are sometimes minute, yet so
significant. Changes occur with trust, patience, faith, and hope.

There
is no more turning away. It is time for us to go deep, in whatever way
is appropriate for us. We keep hope in our hearts that what is occurring
will be just what we need. Patience since there is no way to rush the
process. Keep faith that all is for our highest good and greatest joy
and just trust the process.

Prayer:

I
choose to go deep today. I choose to explore unchartered territory and
take my heart to the depths of my being. I am a warrior of the light.

I
breathe into the core of my being. I let all that doesn’t serve me to
fall by the wayside. I believe that all is in divine order. 

I
have trust, faith, patience and hope.

In this moment I have
everything I need.

I trust in the process of life.

And so
it is.

Amen.