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I could say all names in this piece have been fictionalized, or not. Point is, this unbelievable story is so intricately crafted, you will think that anyway, or not. But don’t just yet rule out the fact that Reality may be stranger than fiction…..
I’m just sticking to this mortal life, this incarnation, which is more
than enough to keep you guys and gals busy for the next 17 seconds or
so. Hey, I’m no womanizer, I don’t have a little black book, just a few
ounces of grey goo to remember it all by heart. And that is plenty for
Back in elementary school, I fell in love with someone other than
myself: Ingrid Koene, IK in short, which synchronistically means I in
Dutch. So I guess I was still in love with me, but she took on the form
of a little brunette lady with the warmest smile you’d ever seen.
Actually, she was the second. The first one was my girl next door,
Sylvia LaGrand, or in translation Sylvia the Great. I still vividly
remember our little play tent in the back yard, where we played house
etc. All the while though, the one I really looked up to was Silvia’s
Mother, Ria LaGrand, who was off limits because she was the Reverse
Generation. But she was absolutely enticing, even to me at age 6 or 7.
The next point of remarkability was highschool, where Monique van der
Peijl was slightly interesting, although Peijl meaning Arrow in
Dutch, she was only pointing towards something bigger and better. Maybe
it was the fur-clad Evelien van Mijnsbergen? Nah, Eveline was a witch,
bitch and a ditch, because she was way above us lowly folk. Mijnsbergen
means as much as ‘My Mountains’ I mean she ddin’t have much as I
remember now, but she was like Mount Everest, and I ain’t no Sherpah
Tenzing. Eventually I ended up with Ada de Waard, a blonde this time,
but with much more accesible terrain. We became good friends, and though
her naam means the Inn Keeper in Dutch, I never stayed the night. In a
cross-literal sence though, ‘Waard’ is also Value, Worth in English.
And believe me, she was absolutely worth it. In fact, we’re still friends, and synchronistically she called me this evening before I wanted to post this..
That, in hindsight is my whole problem: I always want to become friends
first, but once they have me, the ladies never actually want to commit
to anything more… Well, that’s life.
At the end of college, I stumbled into the first girl that did put out:
Ilona Gakeer. Should have been a 4×2 warning, because translating her
last name to English, it literally spells ‘Go Back!’ Having tasted the
Good Life once, I was in no mood to give it up, so I hung on for dear
Life. Should have listened, because after ten days, she dumped me…
But opportuny comes, and comes and comes. By that time I had a pen
friend who seemed interesting. As soon as my first job got me a lease
car, I moved to the center of Holland, and visited her in the Far East,
or the Achterhoek. Things moved fast, and not four months later we lived
together, married 17th of May 1991, and got two girls. It eventually
ended on a 7, in 2005,but I digress. Change of camera viewpoint:
Currently there are three Linda’s in my life, or actually two Linda’s
and a Linda. Neither of them would still be in my little black book if I
had one, because of the following:
Linda Douglas, my ex: Pronounciation and then taking her last name from
literal Dutch, would advise me to ‘Do Glass’ , or become transparent.
I’m not fully there yet, but far enough to at least no longer require
the push she gave me.
Linda Keus, my Human Resource Manager: her naam means ‘Choose’,
indicating that the choice is mine, but she’s not on the menu, she’s
holding it. I eventually did choose from that menu, but then my dish was
taken of it….
Inbetween I found back my twin sister, even though I was not looking for
a sister. Sangeeta was just a taste of what was to come, and faded into
the background as soon as the groundwork for our grand plans was laid.
She could read my mind, finish my sentences, dot my I’s. We’re still
intimately connected, but have never been within a hundred miles of one
Lynda PortaNova: way out in Florida I met Jillian Ballantyne and Lynda
at roughly the same time. One gave me a more or less linear progression
from the L’s, and the Mariah and Lisa I met slightly earlier. Not being
particularly fond of a linear search (too brute force), I figured out
this morning that I was actually instinctively performing a binary
search: I for Ingrid nearly in the middle, although the S for Sylvia was
an overshoot because I didn’t know just how many candidates there would
be. Then back to I (Ilona), figured her close enough to switch to
linear search again. Landed in the L-region, which seemed to have
But work needed done, so my focus shifted. After having gotten three
consecutive positions in Veenendaal (of all places), I figured something
else was afoot: Three L’s, three V’s, and counting my daughters, three
S’s came into my life. Having intuitively named my firstborn Laura
Valerie Slabber, I may have invoked that LVS-spell.
But the last S, was a Serial Killer named Seda Karam. She didn’t break
my heart, but actually stole it, knowing I’d be heartless from then on.
Well, it’s true: I’m growing a beard a la Gabriel Shear, and have the
same cold-hearted tenacity Travolta displayed in Swordfish. I figure I
either want her, or my heart back, whatever I fancy more the moment I
lay my hands on her. Crime of Passion, or do we become the Passion of
There was one purely virtual but very musical lady between them: Teedra Moses swept me completely off my feet during my second job in Veenendaal. Her album Complex Simplicity seemed written just for me, and made Her real beyond anything I’d ever experienced before that:
Enter Annette le-Mer: Muse extraordinaire. She is Sangeeta Squared, in
that she knows EXACTLY what I need to do my job. But other than that,
we’re no match, although I’m positive the connection to her was designed
in Heaven. She told me as you read recently, that my intended is still
out there, higher up because I’m in deep cover, and she’s my lifeline
out of here if stuff screws up. But this time around, I came to finish
the job, get the girl, and go on an extended vacation….
Enter sss, who could very well be Sangeeta Cubed. Male, and hence no
match, but at least it keeps life interesting, Because I definitely need
something to keep my mind off the Lovely One Lady (LOL).
Love your Higher Self,