Image by John M. Kennedy T.

Received by Mercedes Kirkel

Question: I’ve spent a couple of years not being able to forgive the separation that’s happened with my son. I keep wanting to talk things over in order to heal them and it doesn’t work. Then I find myself with a grudge that I have to suck it up and go on, and I haven’t released it.


In the larger sphere, I want to take steps to make a difference in the world, yet let go and let myself be used for whatever purpose it is that I’m being used for. I want hope of making a difference, healing, or forgiveness, while not being trapped by reactivity to what I see in the world that is really out of balance.


: Most of what people think of as forgiveness is not an effective process. It is, again, the Masculine separated from the Feminine.


You have been given teachings of forgiveness that are not whole. They are partial. Many people have the idea that forgiveness is to love the other being. There is truth in that, but it is not the whole truth.


The outcome of forgiveness is to love the other being. But this is not the process of forgiveness. Love is what you get to through forgiveness.


You must begin with the Feminine. This is what most people don’t understand.


Most people who are contemplating forgiveness are aware that they are in pain. They are using forgiveness as both a way to alleviate their own pain and also to move into what they hope is a spiritual process with the other parties are involved.


You must begin with the Feminine. You must always begin with the Feminine. This is one of the great truths that most people do not understand. The Feminine leads to the Masculine. The Feminine loves the Masculine. And the Feminine always leads to the Masculine.


If you start with the Masculine, you are starting with the ending. This does not tend to get you to the Feminine. The Masculine has a different purpose. The Masculine guides the Feminine.


It does not work to begin with the Masculine. It works to begin with the Feminine. Of course, I am speaking to the archetypal Masculine and Feminine that lives within all beings. I am not talking about men and women. I am talking about Masculine-Feminine.


Relative to forgiveness, you begin with the Feminine. You begin with your pain. The grieving process is to feel your pain. But do not stop there. If all you do is feel your pain, it will likely be a very long process of being immersed in pain. If you are willing to go all the way through the feeling of the pain—which for many people is very hard—this will eventually lead you through. But there are much easier processes for doing this work through the Feminine.


You are in pain because something in you has gotten disconnected from your inner divinity. It is not because of what the other person has done. Your pain is not because anyone else did something to you. You were affected by what someone else did and that effect caused you to disconnect from your own divinity.


The feelings you have are telling you that you have become disconnected from your inner divinity. You must use those feelings to find out what part of your inner divine nature you have lost touch with and then reconnect with that part. When you do that, you will heal yourself.


The healing does not come from others. The healing comes from you reconnecting with God. Anytime you are lost in wounding of some sort or other—whether it is grief, anger, resentment, blame—you are fundamentally at war with yourself. That is where the healing must occur.


For example, if you have been in a love relationship that has ended and you are still suffering from that relationship ending, if you still feel grief or blame or whatever about it, those feelings are your help. They are guiding you to the place within yourself where you have lost your connection to God.


If it’s a love relationship, then it’s often in the domain of love where you have lost your connection to God. Love is one of the God-qualities that lives within you. Whatever the outer events were that occurred, you got disconnected from your own connection to love. You got disconnected from the God-quality of love that lives within you, your well of love, your own access to love, the bridge that unites you with God through this particular aspect of yourself—love.


I’m just giving this as an example, but an example that is real for many people in their lives.


Your work is to find the place where you have gotten cut off from love and reconnect. Reconnect with your own knowingness of love. You cannot mourn something that you do not know within yourself. If you are mourning or grieving or in anger, it is a sign that you know this place within yourself and you are missing it. You know what it’s like to have that particular God-quality fulfilled. Go to that place where you know what it is to have that God-quality. Reconnect there and then the healing will begin.


If it is a very deep wound with someone you are very close to—a son, or someone else in your life that you are very close to—this will not happen instantly. It will take time. You will need to come back to this and reconnect over time. You will need to find your God-source within, in the particular form that you disconnected from. Eventually you will be fed again through that particular source or stream. Then love will come alive again within you.


It is at that point where you can turn to the other, not before. When love comes alive in you, then you can turn to the other. When you turn to the other, it is to ask the same question for them. What was motivating them? What part of their inner divinity were they trying to support through the actions that they took? What beautiful God-part of themselves were they doing their best to fulfill, even if it was not in the way you would have liked or you would have chosen. But in their divinity they were doing their best, even perhaps desperately, to stay connected to some part of them that they so needed.


When you find that in the other, on the basis of your own reconnection and strength, then the forgiveness will happen. That is the process.


Questioner: I hear you.


In terms of the world and what appears to be a lack of sanity in our political behavior with each other, are we to just remember that everybody is just trying to fulfill that?


Mary Magdalene: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! The pain is in you. Go to your pain. Go to your source. When you call the world insane, you are saying that it is wrong. You are locked into the third-dimensional model of right and wrong. Go beyond that into your pain. Then you have reentered the domain of the Feminine.


What you’re really saying is, “Ouch, I hurt! I want compassion. I want love. I want spiritual communion carried out in everyday actions.” Yes?


Questioner: Yes!


Mary Magdalene: Your pain is that you have gotten disconnected within yourself to those wells of God-ness within yourself.


You must begin by getting out of your right-and-wrong thinking of who’s insane and who’s sane. Bring it back to you and your connection to God. “Oh yes, I want compassion. I want love. I want spirituality lived in practical life, moment-to-moment guiding our decisions as individuals and a culture.” That’s it. At that point your light of consciousness has found the disconnection in you, and your consciousness is already repairing it.


Then if you want to take it into forgiveness, do so on the basis of asking “What is the beautiful God-part that these people are trying to support in themselves?” These beings that you’re calling insane, there is some great beauty that they are trying to support. Find out what that is. Then your God-self and their God-self can meet. Then you can transform anything.


Questioner: So it’s the remembering of the root.


Mary Magdalene: Always. Thank you.


Questioner: Thank you


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